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Photos and videos for #dissociation

Imersão na cultura da Tribo Zulu - Shakaland 🇿🇦 #Shakaland #southafrica #shakazulu #culturatribal #outravida #dissociation

3 0 Jan 20, 2018

Ive started getting #dissociation due to my stressful life events as of recently. Im doing my best to cope but im not going to lie, its really really hard. #mentalillness #death #loss #grief #mourning #stress

5 2 Jan 20, 2018

MTW (NUMBERS) // ED STORY PRT 9 ⠀ i didn’t stay at Four Winds for very long, less than a week. when i got a hold of my parents and told them the things that had happened, they pulled me out asap. but only on the condition that i eat. this was a problem, because there was only one way i knew how to eat. since coming home from hospital, i found myself locked in a binge cycle for 2 months. no fasting. just bingeing. consequently, i had gained 22lb from a healthy weight of 110, putting me at my highest weight ever. 132. that number was devastating. i was absolutely miserable. i was more depressed than ever, even with several different antidepressants. i was so ashamed of myself. at one point near september, i finally set my foot down, and started taking care of myself a little bit better. still disordered as i refused to take my meds, but eating a healthier amount, my weight slowly started to go down and for a while i felt somewhat happy. i was making and going out with friends. but it wasn’t with the right intentions. (not ed related but relevant) i was still emotionally unstable and reckless. i was bouncing from guy to guy which was smth i did pre ed, craving affection and attention. these guys that i didn’t care about “broke my heart” or so it felt at the time, but i now realize it was being alone that really made me heartbroken. i made poor desiscions and hung out with the wrong people if i wasn’t hurting myself with food then i was doing it another way. i lost my virginity in a school closet during homecoming at a school i didn’t even go to, just to get back at a guy i was mad at for leaving me. when i did this, i completely shut down. i didnt understand why i did, as it didn’t feel significant at the time. it still doesn’t. it’s one of those memories that don’t feel like it’s mine. it didn’t feel like it was mine at the time either but it happened as the residue was hard to miss. i stopped hanging out with people. the only person i talked to was my best friend, J, who was the only person i trusted with my life. my meals started becoming less and less. it got to the point where i was eating only a granola bar everyday.

155 5 Jan 20, 2018

🌸Things have been going alright lately. I had a couple of short dissociative episodes in the past fee days, but nothing too terrible. I wish recovery was a more linear process and that there was not all of these ups and downs. Just when I think I have stopped having a symptom of my mental illness, it comes back like “surprise mother f***er!” Wishing you all good vibes this weekend. Remember to do some self care. 💕😊

30 3 Jan 20, 2018

Today was difficult. A lot of realizations were made. Depression ruined my perception of things. I sat in classes feeling very insignificant. It took so much energy to get through the day, but I did and once I got home I immediately took a nap. Sleeping is one of my best coping strategies. I’m always tired from my physical health not being the best and constantly being on edge from PTSD. The combination of the two allow me to fall asleep at a moments notice. It’s like my superpower. When I woke up I felt a lot better, but now as I type this I’m starting to feel bad again. - - I’m going to start seeing my therapist twice a week and focus on getting through more trauma work. It’s going to be REALLY difficult, but I know I need to do this if I’m going to recover. I can’t help others if I don’t help my self first. - - - - #depression #depressed #anxiety #anxious #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalillness #selflove #mentalhealthrecovery #mentalhealth #livingwithmentalillness #selfharmrecovery #depressionrecovery #recovery #recoveryishard #ptsd #dissociation #cptsd #posttraumaticstressdisorder #endthestigma

47 3 Jan 20, 2018

Existential crisis and chill x

731 70 Jan 20, 2018

Just messin' around. I turn 22 in a few weeks and I have no idea where the time has gone??✨ . . . . #selfie #me #fitmom #winemom #photoedit #cutegirls #dissociation #iremembernothing

12 1 Jan 20, 2018

My #hair is growing out so nicely! I feel like it’s at that perfect length and style that I like with this do. Pumped to see my #bestie becoming_jess today. I’m actually really #happy all things considered and I’m looking forward to a #goodday! Hope you guys all have as great a day as I am anticipating ✌🏼

32 1 Jan 20, 2018

New video up! This is community collab video that we are super proud of and feel is very powerful! Go give it a watch over on our YouTube channel "The Labyrinth System" #dissociativeidentitydisorder #mentalhealth #mentalillness #mentalhealthawareness #dissociation #multiplicity #youtube #important

13 2 Jan 20, 2018

My little one ❤️ so a little update maybe a little TW for some bits just a little negativity and then I'll be back to my positive self ❤️ so basically it's been an awful week all in all I've felt so empty and numb as well as being quite manic and a few people at school have picked up on my giddiness which means it's getting quite bad again, as I'm usually able to hide most of me feels (which doesn't make much sense if you're not familiar with mixed features mania which is what I've had on and off for a while) ❤️ as some of you may have seen on my story, camhs was awful yesterday. My key worker tried to persuade me to go stay with a family friend so I don't have to be at home with my dad since it's causing me so much agony atm but I refused and she ended up getting really stroppy with me and I was like ??? Why??? ❤️ I'm not going to go into details about my diagnoses but basically what they thought was one thing actually isn't the thing (sorry I know that probs doesn't make sense 😂) so now I'm just so confused because I'm showing symptoms that suggest one thing and symptoms that suggest another so yeah I have no clue what's going on with me ❤️ had a few flashbacks recently but I'm powering through and using some of my DBT work to calm the fuck down ❤️ so my mum has been told by camhs to see if home improves by 2 weeks time and if it doesn't then they will make a plan for me and my mum to leave ❤️ still fighting as hard as I can. Anorexia who?? ❤️ Imma try posting more for a while but until then, stay safe guys x . . . . . . . . #anorexia #anorexiarecovery #edrecovery #camhs #ocd #ocdrecovery #hallucinations #psychosis #ptsd #ptsdrecovery #bipolar #bipolardisorder #bipolarrecovery #dpdr #dissociation #derealization #depersonalization #mentalhealth #mentalillness #lgbt #gay #bisexual #nonbinary #agender #bodypositive #bodypositivity #selflove #cat #therapycat

44 6 Jan 19, 2018
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